Sunday, October 28, 2012

T.H.E CAMP or The Hottest Ever Camp organized by PKV or Persaudaraan Kristian Varsiti...

Initially I didn't plan to go but somehow a vision of Swee Kit was haunting me and telling me to go for camp...I mean she has been trying to get me to church or Christian camp from my first year to my fourth semester. This is my fifth semester and she's retired from being a SUFES or Scripture Union Fellowship of Evangelical technically I didn't see her or contact her this semester but somehow in my heard I hear her voice telling me to go for camp...LoL...

So, last minute I registered myself for the camp.
I overslept and was late for the camp...

Camp was at Broga...theme was N.O.W or No Other Way.
Pastor Daniel Tan from SIBKL

1st day lecture on Hearing God's voice. How does He speak? How to hear His voice and How to recognize His voice.
Speaks through Word/bible, Prayer, People, Dreams/visions/signs, circumstances, audible voice. 
Hear through seeking, surrender, still/silent,Stay(wait patiently,don't rush)
Recognize by spending time, if your heart is not right you might hear wrongly, to hear whisper you gotta be near the person.

Morning devotion day 2 reminded me of who I use to be and the people I knew, the heart I had for "special people". I prayed to God when I was younger that I wanted to be an Andrew instead of other apostles cause Andrew's just brought people to God. And God did answer my prayer but the people I brought were not so ordinary, they had some sort of special attitudes in life that annoyed others, make others look down on them and sort of discriminate them. I used to have a special heart for them, pity and wanna reach out to them but when I brought them to church, the people in church didn't really like it and kinda influence me till I started feeling that to layan this sort of person is burdensome and I started feeling ashamed of them and myself. But in my heart I thought, it's this kind of people that God loves and called us to I stop being an instrument of God and stop being an Andrew cause seriously all the people that God send to my way was  weird, stalk-type, annoying, rough, some type of downsyndrom mentality or just has a hateful personality. 
Maybe cause they never experienced enough love or there was no one to guide them? Mostly are from broken families.

Session 2 was on narrow gate and wide gate. narrow way need to find, put in effort, few enter and you find Life but broad way is easy, common, user-friendly, wide, can carry old baggage, compromise, no need to find the way, you will find destruction. 
People rather be wrong than to be correct and alone (Peer pressure experiment of which line is longest)
Darkness prevails because light refuse to shine(they hide under the bowl). You can switch on the Light but you cannot switch on the Darkness. 
According to Leviticus 10:10 HOLY is the opposite of Common. 
Narrow original word "Thlibo"  use feet to press grape juice/wine. If u choose narrow way, u will be stepped on. Jesus could choose easy path but He choose to be persecuted, beaten and crucified.
Narrow way have to be found do need effort.
Only can be saved through HIM. The word THROUGH is the means/reason by which something is done. 
Jesus is my glasses, I cannot see clearly without my glasses. See through the fruits of the spirit then heart will be changed.
Old testament is Law...don't do/commit. Law doesn't change us.
New testament is think CHRIST-like...don't think. Thinking changes our heart.

Workshop DRCAB, or CPR. It's the unconscious ones that you need to attend first medically cause it's the most critical.
Urgency to reach out. We take for granted that our friends will live long and hope that others will help the people cause we don't see the urgency. We are in campus for only a limited time , it's our natural setting and we got contacts, Probably it's our only chance to reach out to them cause we might be the only Christ Ambassador they know.

Session 3 Disturb us, Lord. Life is very precious even a dog's life cause it's a life. Don't be so busy with your ministry that you forget the meaning of the ministry. Little bit of time and money can  mean something to others, I cannot change the whole world but I can change the whole world of one person. Life is short so the best use of life is to live for a cause bigger than yourself.
God can heal the world, stop evil and make the world a better place in one snap but if He did that, what would we do then? what is the church function? God didn't cause He wanna give us a chance to participate, be a part of the cause/effort.
God disturbs us in a progress. He asks us to start small, then go deeper and finally surrender all.
Jesus never waited for opportunity to arrive but he was attentive/aware to the opportunity around.
Peter and John's boat so full of fish that boats about to sink-if their eyes were on success they would sink. Their eyes were fixed on Jesus, they were willing to leave everything behind...biggest catch in their life also.

morning devotion day 3 reminded Jesus is all we need. When you're alone, you don't have anything, no physical  material...see beyond the physical, Life is beyond wealth, material and when you think you are alone, remember that God will not leave nor forsake you.

session 4 when Jesus talks, He doesn't waste words. Jesus said He WILL build HIS Church and the gates of hell cannot overcome it. Church is the pillar and foundation of the truth. (cannot exist without pillar or foundation)
So many social problems.We must do something or not, can you imagine in the future our children open their textbooks and see that prostitution is a LEGAL profession? Can you imagine your child ambition is to be a pornstar? In New Zeland prostitution is already a legal profession.
Don't do good works to convert people but do it cause you genuinely care for them hence living out the gospel. Give only what you have not what you don't have, Jesus only ask of what you have, not what you don't have. You shine by loving others genuinely then people will see Jesus and praise God in heaven. if you wanna shine, focus on what you have-time, money, effort, lending a hand. Stretch your hand to show you accept, lift others up...Restore dignity, not just donate. 5 loaves of bread and 2 fish-give what you got and God will use it to do's not the quantity size but giving whatever you have.
It's never too late. The power of togetherness :)

Baby Erik and the old man

A story I heard in THE CAMP.

a true story...

We were the only family with children in the restaurant. I sat Erik in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly eating and talking. Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, "Hi there." He pounded his fat baby hands on the highchair tray. His eyes were wide with excitement and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin. He wriggled and giggled with merriment.

I looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man with a tattered rag of a coat; dirty, greasy and worn. His pants were baggy with a zipper at half-mast and his toes poked out of would-be shoes. His shirt was dirty and his hair was uncombed and unwashed. His whiskers were too short to be called a beard and his nose was so varicose it looked like a road map. We were too far from him to smell, but I was sure he smelled.

His hands waved and flapped on loose wrists. "Hi there, baby; hi there, big boy. I see ya, buster," the man said to Erik. My husband and I exchanged looks, "What do we do?" Erik continued to laugh and answer, "Hi, hi there." Everyone in the restaurant noticed and looked at us and then at the man. The old geezer was creating a nuisance with my beautiful baby.

Our meal came and the man began shouting from across the room, "Do ya know patty cake? Do you know peek-a-boo? Hey, look, he knows peek-a-boo."
Nobody thought the old man was cute. He was obviously drunk. My husband and I were embarrassed. We ate in silence; all except for Erik, who was running through his repertoire for the admiring skid-row bum, who in turn, reciprocated with his cute comments.

We finally got through the meal and headed for the door. My husband went to pay the check and told me to meet him in the parking lot. The old man sat poised between me and the door. "Lord, just let me out of here before he speaks to me or Erik," I prayed.
As I drew closer to the man, I turned my back trying to side-step him and avoid any air he might be breathing. As I did, Erik leaned over my arm, reaching with both arms in a baby's "pick-me-up" position.

Before I could stop him, Erik had propelled himself from my arms to the man's. Suddenly a very old smelly man and a very young baby consummated their love relationship. Erik in an act of total trust, love, and submission laid his tiny head upon the man's ragged shoulder. The man's eyes closed, and I saw tears hover beneath his lashes. His aged hands full of grime, pain, and hard labor-gently, so gently, cradled my baby's bottom and stroked his back.

No two beings have ever loved so deeply for so short a time. I stood awestruck. The old man rocked and cradled Erik in his arms for a moment, and then his eyes opened and set squarely on mine. He said in a firm commanding voice, "You take care of this baby," Somehow I managed, "I will," from a throat that contained a stone. He pried Erik from his chest-unwillingly, longingly, as though he were in pain. I received my baby, and the man said, "God bless you, ma'am, you've given me my Christmas gift."

I said nothing more than a muttered thanks. With Erik in my arms, I ran for the car. My husband was wondering why I was crying and holding Erik so tightly, and why I was saying, "My God, my God, forgive me."

I had just witnessed Christ's love shown through the innocence of a tiny child who saw no sin, who made no judgment; a child who saw a soul, and a mother who saw a suit of clothes. I was a Christian who was blind, holding a child who was not. I felt it was God asking- "Are you willing to share your son for a moment?" -- when He shared His for all eternity.
The ragged old man, unwittingly, had reminded me, "To enter the Kingdom of God, we must become as little children."

Thursday, October 25, 2012

It's been a really tiring semester... 23 credit hour plus 6 hours of mandarin classes and the silly SERU program. Seru is student empowerment research unit which sends us to ceramah and softskills workshops which are WAJIB! It took all my fridays and saturdays...9am to 5pm...Gosh, there was no warning or whatsoever that my fridays and saturdays do not belong to me this semester.

The University should have informed us earlier, not just bombard us ambush style and suddenly make it compulsory and then scold us for not going...come on, you didn't even give us a heads up! Apparently if we don't go we will face some problems when we graduate, they wanna hold our degree? WHAT! so silly I tell you. UM should have made it open so that whoever wanna go can go instead of making it mandatory for those who don't want to go.... Not everyone is free on friday and saturday you know...

This semester I joined Silat Gayong...The first class was fun and we learned a lot. 8pm until midnight...

I feel this semester is really heavy cause once more we have mr Nizam teaching us 2 subjects. Mr Nizam Nordin's assignments are heavy and his test are quite heavy.

Taking elective course like gender is a suicide mission. The lecturer doesnt give marks easily and the assignment is heavy too.

well, I do hope I will be able to maintain first class this semester.

Of cause another worrisome thing is i'm having dr Wirdati class again. The last time I had a B minus for her subject and it was a 4 credit hour subject so that really pulled my CGPA down.

It's a very tiring situation, I fall asleep in almost every class.

And Yes, I do see Pandelela in UM about once a week but No, I don't talk to her...Don't know what to say...LoL. By the way, she's taller than me... LoL, this semester only I realised I am actually quite short...

Thursday, October 4, 2012

fittest to fit-less

I have always been athletic since young...I love sports, outdoor activities, extreme sports and camps...
But now, most of the people who used to be less athletic than me are NOW more athletic than me and so much more fit...

Years ago, this people wouldn't even join sports day but now I see them actively participating in many sports  activities almost every week. Their lifestyle is so much more active than me and their fitness surpassed me.

I can't bring myself to accept this yet..I mean I USED to be more fit than all of them but now they are at least twice fitter than me.

I know it's a good thing but maybe I'm jealous? LoL.

it's also the same with studies...I used to be the top student for that subject in the past but now I am like a noob in that subject...

I guess time can change passion and reverse roles. Ultimately this confirms my life philosophy that Life is a Reverse Psychology. What you expect to last will not last, what you expect will never happen will happen, as I said before Life is a cruel joke...In the end, the positive conclusion you can make from here is People CAN change to be better. So, don't be too comfortable, complacent or take things for granted as everything can change...sometimes so slowly that you don't realise the change is happening.