Glow GLO Low

Glo...Gospel Literature Outreach. It's a program sort of like RBS(Residential Bible School)
6 weeks too but a day extra, at the same cost. The studying time in GLO is only half day and the other half is free.In GLO, there are mission works every weekend either at other churches or Orang Asli(OA). But in RBS, there is accountability and mentors. ^^
BTW: I'm only referring to GLO level 1, not level 2. Level 2 is 6 months...


Why do I want to go for GLO? Well,I was hoping that I could learn something deeper, more about God's Word and His Ways. That was the same reason I went for RBS...NOW, let me tell you frankly about RBS...I already learn most of it at church already la. I don't know if my Youth Fellowship(YF) is super or I really pay attention in church? One thing for sure is that I was a bit disappointed la with RBS. Don't get me wrong, the community and spiritual discipline is good but the content was more for the new Christians and definitely not for me. Will GLO be a re-run? What if the syllabus is almost same...Aiyo...

Someone in authority talked to me and told me to think properly..."Do you really want to go for Glo?, Would it be a repetition of RBS? Do you think GLO will benefit you? Are you convinced that God wants you to go for GLO? Will it be better if you stay back and help at your home church and your family or go to GLO? I'm saying this with your mom in mind. Is it a selfish reason to go for GLO? Are you going to GLO for "simply-simply" and holiday? I'm not asking you to choose between good and evil but it's a situational choice. In this present situation, where can you serve or be a blessing best? SMBB CF needs a lot of help too. I think you got enough head knowledge already. Pray and seek God, He will definitely talk to you. God will speak to you. He WILL! I will pray for you too."

INdirectly that person was saying to me "DON'T BE A TADPOLE"...It's time to put your knowledge into application! Even my brother Prince, said it's true, Prince thinks I got enough head knowledge but no fruits. Prince said "don't be a tadpole" to me too.

Francis said "Don't take church as an occupation" or something like that la. Then I "terasa" la. I always thought I'm gonna be a missionary, it was a dream. But when I come to think more deeper, it wasn't God convicted but it was just me, my selfish ambition. GLO and this statement of Francis really hit me. It brought me to realisation of what a selfish person I actually am.
Come to think of it, me going to GLO is more selfish too.


No more Missionary nor GLO...I feel lost, no sense of direction anymore.
First Bible Knowledge(BK) and Accounts. I thought it was God's will for me. I was so convinced that these would be my Majors. Then form 6 at SMK Sri Pantai was really heartbreaking! And now no GLO and Missionary? All the direction I targeted are gone...

I feel so lost and stun and frustrated! I don't know where to turn or look nor where to go anymore? I'm lost! Lost Direction... I feel so broken and lost

A few verses pop into my head. Psalms 3:5-6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart and Lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge HIM and He will make your paths straight"

Proverbs 19:21 "Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the LORD's purpose that prevails."

You see, all these brought me into realisation that it wasn't God who put those plans but it was ME! I didn't even consult God. For BK and Accounts, after I got the superb results, I got arrogant and thought it was my own strength when the fact is it was actually God's, not mine! SO He blocked me to continue in this stupidity of relying on my own "strength"

Making me feel broken and lose my sense of direction is actually in fact calling me to come back to HIM. Rely on HIM, not on my own knowledge nor understanding and certainly not on my own strength.

Micah6:8 "He has showed you, O man, what is good. And what does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God"

Isaiah 55:6-11

⁶ Seek the LORD while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.

⁷ Let the wicked forsake his way
and the evil man his thoughts.
Let him turn to the LORD, and he will have mercy on him,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.

⁸ "For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.

⁹ "As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.

¹⁰ As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,

¹¹ so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.